And this is when all adults of the world, both parents and not, look at me quizzically and shout one large resounding DUH in my gigantic naive face that was clearly on a vacation to La-La Land the day they went over the topic of parenting multiples in Sunday School. And I reply with a gracious yet exhausted-of-every-last-ounce-of-usable-energy sigh and flop of my head into my hands.
Two is so much more than double the work of one. In fact, I'm reminded of the day I learned to graph Y = X^2 and discovered the joys of exponential growth charts. Today I'm feeling a little bit like the upper Y values on that graph of Y = x^2...
Again, DUH. I know.
But. Ashton has been on summer break from school, I returned to work, Helena decided she needed more nutrients than what I could physically offer her all by myself, Daddy's travel schedule has been Insane with a capital I (which I'd make exponentially capital if that was possible), and well... It's been kind of a big month.
Sure, Ash will return to school next week and I enjoy my job and Leni and I are sorting out her nourishing preferences (and my capabilities of meeting those preferences) and Daddy is... well Daddy's still busy busy but also starting to internalize the few yet important keys to a not bonkers Mommy. It's just taking a while to get to that slightly more calm state that once existed but now apparently requires a pirate's bounty kind of bribe to lure anywhere near our property.
Two big enormous super-sized bonuses:
1) Ash LOVES his school and is so excited to start the new year next week. We couldn't be luckier to have such an amazing facility accessible mere blocks away from home.
2) We're worked out a decent schedule with two babysitters that should help us stave off daycare for Leni for a few months. We absolutely trust the daycare center we picked out for her to start full time in January, but there's nothing like knowing that she'll be in the comfort of her own home, right across the driveway from our home office, receiving one-on-one care for a few more months.
Even with those two wonderful facts on full display right there in front of me, I'm still stressed out about making sure Ash gets the attention he needs while Leni gets the nutrition she needs while my work gets the productivity they need while Daddy gets the evidence he needs to remain under the impression that he didn't marry a complete wack job. And not quite so surprisingly all of this is not helping my efforts to boycott Dunkin Donuts.
And the one tidbit that I'll continue to hold on to with every shred of strength in my soul is the knowledge that this is just a phase and these days we're in a sort of revolving door relationship with phases so I could very well wake up tomorrow and not feel the ten ton weight on my chest that threatened to bury me in the Mariana Trench this morning.
Universe, if you're listening, it's about time for a phase change.