July 21, 2010

Just Kidding

I should have known better. Publicly admitting to making progress is just asking, no, screaming for that very progress to come to a screeching halt, no, actually go in reverse. I haven't backtracked completely to corner #2, thankfully I am still on my way to corner #3 and making somewhat forward progress. It just looks a bit more like a zig-zag at the moment with lots of breaks. Lots.


That real me I referred to in that last post? Still somewhere out there, just not completely reattached as of yet. It was fun to have a moment of confidence though. To actually see what's going on around me and ponder and reflect rather than the reactive state my mind has been locked in to for the last 4 1/2 weeks that's gotten amazingly accurate at catching newborn projectile body fluids in mid air. Not exactly great mental prep for digesting the entirety of the Sunday NY Times.


The point is that a corner was indeed rounded, but I've a long way to go before closing the perimeter.

New goals for the week:

#1: Place more online orders for adult mystery novels and political nonfiction books than online orders at Diapers.com.
#2: Actually read one of the adult mystery novels or political nonfiction books instead of scouring the Internet for answers to questions about sibling jealousy, adoption attachment specific to major life events (bringing home baby sister), "normal" newborn eating/pooping behaviors, and infant developmental milestone timelines.
#3: Leave the house alone, at least once, for at least an hour.

That should set me on a pretty decent course to make progress towards corner #3. There I go again making public comment about potential progress-making...I'm so screwed.


PC said...

It's good to have a rich fantasy life LOL!!!

Karen said...

I'm cheering for you! And progress, albeit small and sometimes even short-lived, is progress and worthy of celebration. So cheers!

Anonymous said...

Don't worry you will get there! Just writing about your adventures takes some of back to our attempts at some sort of normalcy. But its a great journey...:)