July 24, 2009

Taken

Daily, on so many levels. I'll never fully understand or be able to remotely digest why I'm here like this. Why I'm his mom, why he's his dad, why we're what he's got. I'm pretty sure we're doing an OK job, but that wont ever keep me from questioning whether I'm doing well enough not to worry. Because I will always, worry. I'm taken by our own selfish fortune, by his misfortune, by all of our seemingly naive perceptions of how things might just work. Every now and then I glance back at the two year video we created, the archive of posts we've accumulated, and the corresponding library of photos and comments, and I'm taken. He's so perfect and we're so not. It's been in my vision to adopt internationally since before before existed, and perhaps I just never thought what I visioned would actually come to be. But it has. And he's so amazing. And I'm so taken. I hope life continues to take us like this. Daily surprises and ongoing adventures. I think it will, I know we're up for it.

2 comments:

Amanda and Co. said...

:)
I think that's what it's supposed to feel like...
full of worry and wonderment at the people our children are.

I think if it's not that way, then we're not doing something right.

He's a beautiful, beautiful boy!

Christa Bertram said...

How blessed we all are to have these wonderful children in our lives. Let me introduce myself....I'm on the UpstateNY yahoo group, but I'm really more from Northern NY...near Watertown. We returned from Ethiopia in May 2009 with our son who is now 4 years old. If you are ever this direction look us up.
:)